YOU NEED TO LET GO OF LOVE. ITS OK TO CRY IT OUT. PART 1 OF 6.

Love is one of the most exciting, rewarding and satisfying of human experiences. Whether the love of family, friends, a child or romantic love, it is a shared human adventure. Just as high as one might feel at the tip of that love, the lows can be devastatingly painful when it is time to let go of that loved one. Whether needing to let go because they have passed on, or because it is time to move on from the relationship, grief is a component. You should grieve what was lost and accept the healing hands of time. Recognize your emotional limits, but don’t isolate yourself as you let someone go and heal from the loss.
 

Part 1 Grieving the Relationship

1. 
   
   Understand the five stages of grief. These stages could more accurately be described as cycles. You may skip stages, never experience other stages, and you can find yourself stuck in stages. But you may experience some or all stages in waves repeatedly. These stages are:^[1]

   • Denial and isolation: This stage involves denying the reality of the situation. It is a natural response to overwhelming pain caused by grief.
   • Anger: This stage emerges once the denied pain starts to surface. Anger can be aimed at inanimate objects, strangers, family or friends. You may feel angry at the person who died or left, and then you may feel guilty for feeling angry.
   • Bargaining: In this stage, you may feel like you need to regain control from feeling helpless. You might worry about how you should have been a better person, or you should have gotten help sooner, and so on.
   • Depression: This stage brings sadness and regret that comes with the realization that the loved one is truly gone. You may feel overwhelming sadness, crying, and so on.
   • Acceptance: This stage may be characterized by reaching a state of calm and withdrawal. Some people may never reach this stage of grief.
   
   
2. 
   
   Acknowledge your grief. The relationship has, in fact, died. Therefore, it is okay to feel as though someone precious has died. You are entitled to feel your loss. Ride the waves of grief without getting pulled under or lost in them. Don’t fight them. Recognize them for what they are: waves of emotion that will take you through some strange currents for a season all the while giving your heart space to heal. Grief is part of healing.

   • Even if no one else in your life knows what you are experiencing, you can still acknowledge your own pain to yourself. When you feel down, take a moment and say, “I’m sad, and it’s okay. It gets better.”
3. 
   
   Share your grief with others. While those around you may not understand the depth of what you are feeling, don’t be afraid to share your grief with a couple of people you know you can trust.
4. 
   
   Seek professional help if you need it. If you are concerned that you may be grieving unhealthily or that you are depressed, you may want to seek professional help. A therapist can help you understand your grief and whether you are becoming depressed.

   • Read “How to Get Rid of Depression” to better understand depression.
   • It can be useful to talk with a therapist even if you’re not depressed. A therapist can help you understand how to work through your grief.